Working On Yourself, For Yourself, By Yourself

The question you should ask yourself is, do you really love yourself? Naturally, this is something we have all experienced personal moments with either feeling a sense of unbalance, disconnection and a serious lacking in self –love. But what does the concept of ‘loving yourself’ truly mean?

• Is self-love looking in the mirror without any thoughts of criticism?

• Is self-love feeling a mass of confidence with the stage you are at in life?

• Is self-love prioritising ourselves in any situation?

I don’t believe there is a correct answer to this question as everyone has their very own perception. Growing up, I was taught the importance of being selfless in every aspect, but through this lesson, it became apparent to me how at times I would do things according to other people’s expectations without even noticing, it became my norm. But I feel as though it is my job to challenge this habit in order to motivate change.

“Why should we worry about what others think of us, do we have more confidence in their opinions than we do our own?”
– Brigham Young

For a very long time, the concept of self-love has been foreign to me, where I am still currently in the process of sincerely understanding this practice. Although, I do believe that being selfless is a key character trait to possess but in with the right way! Living my life according to the views of other people’s opinions left a negative impression in my adult life, there was a loss of fulfilment. In the past, I felt as though I spent a considerable amount of time focusing on serving obligation to obligation whilst keeping myself busy for the sake of being busy. I gave everyone else 100% of me and I gave myself 0%, which is by no means a healthy way to live life. In this case, recognise the difference between remaining true to yourself & feeling confident about who you are rather than adapting who you are to match other people’s standards. An original is always better than a copy, period!

“If only you could sense how important you are to the lives of those you meet; how important you can be to people you may never even dream of. There is something of yourself that you leave at every meeting with another person.”
– Fred Rogers

With that being said, I have discovered that the moment you love yourself, you accept your so-called weaknesses and begin appreciating these so-called shortcomings as something that makes you who you are. You prioritise your well-being in a way where you can serve others in a truly selfless way whilst loving yourself first with the utmost compassion.

Is there a way to really truly love ourselves 100%?

The truth is, 100% would be ideal, however, to accomplish complete acceptance takes time. As, judgemental as we can be about others, we are our biggest critics, a part of liking yourself would involve identifying your own good qualities. But failing to appreciate one’s own good qualities does not necessarily prevent you from recognizing them in others. This is where we go wrong. For many of us, the solution is to master how to conquer our deepest insecurities whether it’s in relation to a friendship, relationship, self-image or anything else it is vital to separate those fears and keep your confidence in check. It is all about acceptance, to accept ourselves as we are, which means to value our imperfections as much as our perfections in order to move forward towards change.

We have far more power and control than we often realise to generate the feelings we want to experience in life, we just have to discover how to tap into those feelings. Take this opportunity to search for those very feelings in which prevents you from practising self-love, master the art of this practice to build a magical yet strong foundation for yourself. The deepest principle in human nature is the craving of feeling appreciated, however, the secret is to cultivate a loving and healthy relationship with yourself first to live a life full of happiness, peace and sincere fulfilment.

“When you adopt the viewpoint that there is nothing that exists that is not part of you, that there is no one who exists who is not part of you, that any judgment you make is self-judgment, that any criticism you level is self-criticism, you will wisely extend to yourself an unconditional love that will be the light of the world.”
– Harry Palmer

Good luck on your journey ahead, I hope you are able to discover your confidence and to love yourself.

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