Financial Compatibility vs Love, Which Do You Pick?

When establishing any type of partnership with someone, it is naturally going to be a calculated process to analyse all aspects of that individual before placing 100 per cent commitment. When navigating through the talking stages of the relationship, it’s important to seize that opportunity to really think about what you want as well as, what you can offer in that relationship. Truth be told, in considering any potential candidate you’ll definitely have some standards of what you expect. In this social media climate, of expensively lavish spending, those standards have certainly raised the bar high to match this false pretence of what looks socially pleasing. Not to say that influence goes for everyone however, in this era of Instagram, Snapchat and Twitter, the world of dating has completely transformed. People are especially extremely inclined to assess their compatibility and satisfaction with their future bae when the subject of finances is concerned and in their own right! There is a major fear of judgement centred around the conversation of money. From a female perspective, this discussion can create a gold-digging impression and for a man, the notion of being stingy or too heavily money focused. Love and money are two incredibly complicated affairs which have the potential to initiate failure when they’re combined carelessly.

What comes first, Love or Money? Well, they say that “money can’t buy happiness but, it can buy comfort, stability and entertainment which makes finding happiness much easier” and while that’s definitely true, there can certainly be a lot of unhappiness created by a lack of money or varying attitudes to finance within a couple. Most of us believe that sincere love has nothing to do with money, you can fall in love with personality, ambition and simple enjoyment of their company before even considering finances as a topic of conversation. In reality, a financially compatible partner can bring you closer to a meaningful and happy relationship with the involvement of joint financial goals and adequate money management skills. Yet that all rely on the basic rules, agreements, and financial strategies that you develop with yourself first!

The idea of financial compatibility can refer to many things but in this instance sources from self-evaluation. The goal, before any commitment, is to first establish full independence and financial comfort within your own life rather than seek that in someone else. Take a moment to re-assess how financially independent you currently are. All these expectations of what you desire from someone else, are you able to provide to yourself? Therefore, transparency, responsibility and equality are three very important factors to consciously prioritise. Meaning, be transparent with YOUR current status; are you a student? newly graduate in debt? a part-time employee? Unemployed? etc Realistically, your status determines to what scale you are able to provide in a relationship and one very big mistake is not considering if you have the means to support yourself whilst treating someone else. You can’t have the best of both worlds when you have responsibilities to prioritise! There are much more important things to focus on like investing in your career/ long term ambitions and most importantly investing in yourself. So often do people crave companionship and forget about the bigger picture, what is a life with someone else if you have failed to create a happy, stable life for yourself? Let’s be real, a relationship essentially is a major financial investment and depending on how high maintenance your partner is/ or you are this could be a real deal-breaker. Where things tend to go left in a relationship, is the moment you either become financially responsible or ultimately financially vulnerable to someone else. Remember, that the same way you want to be treated, with respect, loyalty and love is equally expected to be reciprocated. Equality in any type of partnership builds a good foundation, so yes keep your standards high but also recognise equal input is required.

The point here is very clear, cancel out the double standards!

Yours Truly Sasi